have you ever caught someone staring at you and wondered what they’re thinking about like if it’s something positive or negative if it’s a passing thought or a long internal string of things if they’re even thinking about you at all or you just happen to be in the line of sight while their mind drifts off about something completely unrelated
whaddup, my name is Blenderdick Custardbath
And I am Benadryl Slumberbelch. Lord of all.
Beezlebub Calldispatch. Well then.
Bonapart Uptoscratch! (these things are usually dumb but I like this one)
Does this make me Prince Humperdinck’s long lost sibling-rat-thing? I think yes
these are beautiful
I am the real Bonapart Thundermunch
Wanna know something I learnt?
In WWII the phrase “Vatican Cameos” was used when a person who was not in the British army came before the general, or other high up ranks, as a signal to the other officers that the person was armed.
So when Sherlock says “Vatican Cameos” to warn John that the safe has a gun in it, it’s not something that they’ve set up as a code word- It’s a code Sherlock knew John would know- being a soldier!
having a crush on someone is like when you eat a dorito and you don’t chew it enough and you feel it slide slowly down your throat and slice up your insides
“Mi papá tiene 47 años = my dad is 47 years old
Mi papa tiene 47 anos = my potato has 47 assholes”
I love spanish.
The best, funniest Ben interview I’ve ever read, and of course it’s Caitlin Moran.
I think it makes a difference when the person interviewing is famous in their own right—and brings that confidence into the interview.
our president is a sarcastic motherfucker.
if you ever feel bad about yourself remember that george bush was once informed that 4 brazilian people were killed in iraq and he responded ‘how many is a brazilian’